What have learned about myself these last few days? Well, I have learned that I do not stick to healthy eating if I don’t have it set in my mind that that is what I am doing. Without a specific experiment or challenge going on I find that I don’t put any boarders on what I allow myself to eat. I did “ok” today but I did eat some tater tots. The question I need to ask myself is what did I get out of eating the tater tots? Did they fuel my body- not in the right way I’m sure. Did they give me energy- no. Did they make me feel better physically- NO! Did they make my mind sharper- No. Did they make me feel good about myself- NO! So, what did they do for me? They went into my mouth, I tasted the wonderful grease, felt the crispies crunch between my teeth, and I tasted all of the spicy salsa, salty salt, greasy grease, and all of the other crap. There is not a single thing that I can list that actually benefits me and my body. To tell you the truth, I don’t even know why I ate them. I brought lunch and at that point I wasn’t even really hungry. So, I have also learned that it’s not really hunger that drives my food desires. When I start to think about a not so good for me food I start to picture it and think about how it tastes. I really don’t think it’s about fulfilling hunger but more so the act of actually eating it.
Bonus- I am still NOT smoking!!! Man I am just a BADASS!
Today was ok- not great.
Energy- good until I ate the tater tots and then I fell fast
Mood- not terrible but irritable
Mental clarity- good- not great
As Always- FUCK YOU CANCER!!!! Lord thank you for allowing me to have the life I have.